Keeping your Relationship in Shape

By Nina HumphreyAll relationships go through their ups and downs, but the most important part is to know if it’s worth fighting for. Here are a eight tips from someone who knows how to keep a relationship healthy.1.You know those cute, subtle quirks that attracted you to your partner at first? Well, with time, they most likely will turn into toe-curling annoying habits. Learn to love all of them, biting nails and all.2.You both need to be secure and comfortable. A lasting relationship is based on compromise and a great deal of give and take on both sides. For instance, if your partner can’t make it to your job’s Christmas party, it doesn’t mean they don’t want to be seen with you. It might just be that they’re actually busy, don’t freak out!3.Encourage listening to each other, by showing appreciation for when it happens. Show interest even if you have no idea what they’re talking about. For example, my boyfriend loves video games. I can’t tell you the difference between Playstaion and X-Box, I’m clueless! However, I make it a point to go to the video game store and get excited when he does. I even play the games with him once in a while. I’m not good, but he cares that I try. Plus, when he plays it gives me time to read my VOUGE magazines. When they do listen or show that they care about what you care about, save a special kiss or smile to show that you noticed they were trying.4.Appreciate each other. Don’t just take for granted that your girlfriend always helps you with your math. Make each other feel like you know that you are there by choice, because you both care. You don’t always have to wait for spontaneous compliments, say something good about yourself and ask you partner if they agree.5.Without quality time, your relationship will not survive. Make sure you have little dates every other week even if you’ve been together for five years. Make dinner, rent a movie or play games. You don’t have to spend a lot of money to get quality time. Talk! Make sure you devote at least thirty minutes a week to tell your partner what’s going on in your life and how you feel about everything. That way, if you are really stress and end up taking it out on them, at least they know why. However ladies, try to leave out the major details. Your man does not care if Karen at work just got her nails done. They don’t know Karen, they don’t care.6.Hidden resentments poison a relationship so if something bothers you, say it. Don’t bring it up four months later in another disagreement. Chances are, your partner had no idea that it made you angry. Plus, if you don’t mention it bothered you, they’ll keep doing it blindly.7.Keep your dependence and independence in balance. Tell and show your partner how much you need them, but don’t be clingy as that that can make your partner feel trapped. Girls, don’t tell him everything that you did on a girl’s night out. A little secrecy (in an innocent term) can go a long way. Its okay to go out and dance with a guy at a nightclub, as long as he keeps his hands above the waist and your bodies are at least an inch apart, have fun!8.Life is too short not to take advantage of letting loose. Just be careful and respect your partner. Love is a beautiful thing, so don’t waste it and don’t play with it. Having a broken heart can be one of the worst feelings ever, so don’t be the cause breaking yours or anyone else’s.